by Brittany High
This is the rare Monkey Orchid, found only in high elevations of Ecuador and Peru. The primate-esque flowers are formally known as Dracula simia, but I like to keep things casual. Like, really casual. Last week I got sent home early from work for wearing PJs to the office. I was like “C’mon, it’s casual Friday!” and the HR lady was all, “It’s Tuesday.” She suggested I start showing up for work BEFORE lunch and NOT reek of tiki drinks, which is completely rude. This is who I am — I will not be oppressed by the man!