Grass Flip Flops

Do you miss the summertime when you can run barefoot in the yard with the fluffy green grass under your feet? These grassy flip flops by Kusa might be just the thing to get you through. Sure they’re not real grass, but that just means you don’t have to mow ‘em! I might have to get me a pair. See, my yard has been claimed by a homeless dude named Jesus Criminy. He lives (read: eats, sleeps, shits, yells at the neighbor kids about UFOs) there. And even if he left, I wouldn’t dare take a chance walking around barefoot. You never know what’ll be lurking in those few patches of dead brown grass. Some doodie? A broken bottle? A dirty needle? It’s a (not-fun) grab bag. $30