Etsy artist Raul Souza is selling this Bloody Cleaver Ring. And might I say it’s a bloody clever ring too? No? I can’t say that? Then let’s just pretend it never happened. You can have your very own cleaver ring for $230. Just don’t be surprised when you’re instantaneously profiled as a serial killer. And when that time comes, hit me up! It happens to me all the time so you’ll be in good company. Okay, okay — you’ll be in mediocre company. At best!