Because pizza doesn’t grow on trees, but apparently you can grow it in a pot, here’s a Grow Your Own Pizza Kit. I’ve never been much of a gardner, but for pizza I’d definitely make an exception. I’d do anything for you, Pizza! The kit comes with packets of tomato, basil, and oregano seeds, along with some pots, compost, plant markers, and a booklet with some tips and puzzles. Wait, that’s all? Uh, what about the cheese? And dough? Most importantly, where the f*** are the toppings? Wow, this is actually just a gardening kit in the guise of a pizza kit — I been duped. Duped, I tell you!